By now, there are very few people on the planet–or at least in the mommy blogger world I often live–who haven’t heard that the Duggars are expecting their 20th child.  The mom is my husbands age.  The idea of a 20th child gives me absolute nightmares.  NIGHTMARES.  I am happy with my two children.  Would I have “had” more if I were younger?  Absolutely.  But I’m not.  I’m 40 and that last thing I want is more little butts to wipe and people in my bed.

But that is me.  That is my choice.  I am slightly irritated by the sheer amount of criticism that has be waged at the Duggars for their choices.  Is it a choice I would make?  No, but it also isn’t my place to judge them.  They seem like perfectly nice (if not slightly insane) people who love their kids and have an amazing family bond.  So, hey.  Produce away.

I also respect their choice to not use birth control and give over the destiny to God.  This is not something I subscribe to.  I’m not religious but I get their faith and appreciate that it is theirs.  They have the means to support their family.  I understand that some of their income comes from the exploitation of their family for TV–but when I watch their show (which is rarely) they seem like a well-adjusted family.  I am not naive to think that everything I see on TV is true, but after all the years they have been on and having all of these kids–I think that if there were some severe issues, we’d have heard already.

This is one of the issues within our community of moms–we are quick to judge the choices of others.  How ever many kids the Duggars have has zero effect on me.  Whether our not someone stays home with their kids or works outside of the home because it has zero effect on me.

So, as you (we/me) sit in judgment of others it is important to understand the negative effect our judgments have on our community of women who should support the right choose.