Noah

GOOOOOOOOAL

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 1 Comment

Okay, so maybe that might be a little melodramatic.  But as a former soccer player, I have to admit it was awesome watching Noah score his first goal.  It was a proud parent moment.

I sadly don’t have a picture or video of it–well maybe not sadly, as the memory of the goal can live on big and glorious with the reality of the ball trickling through the goalies legs and over the line.  It was a bit like slow motion.  But when you are 6 and playing soccer for the first time–it might have well have been a shot from outside of the 18 that find the top right corner.  It feels the same, when it’s your first–AMAZING.

The look on Noah’s face was one of pure shock and amazement.  It was his teams first goal in two games.  He is playing in an instructional league which is great–as he is learning a great deal and they really focus on skills.  Their games are short quarter-field games with only 5 players per team on the field.  It has been good for him and each time he plays and practices (they have a 1 and 1/2 hour practice 1x per week and then a 1hr game on Friday nights–under the lights).

My brother was able to come to the game and he was an pretty awesome soccer star in his day and Noah was so excited.  He ran by the side line early on in the game and smiled huge and waved at his uncle.  It was cute.  It takes me back to the days I played–on the very same fields my son currently plays on.  The high and lows–the amazing victories and the crushing losses.

I try not to get my hopes up that soccer will be the sport he loves.  The sport he can’t imagine not playing.  The sport the lives in his blood and dreams.  But for now, I will watch from the sidelines, cheering for him.  It warms my heart to know exactly how it feels to be out on the pitch.

I love that he loves sports.  I think sports are the most important thing our kids do.  Not because they are all going to be amazing athletes–but there is something about being part of a team.  About being part of something that is bigger than just you.  Team sports give a kid (and adults) and opportunity to build character in a way that other activities don’t.  It brings out their grit and perseverance.  It teaches them hard and important lessons about failure.

For Noah–his team lost, but he scored a goal.  He both lost and won.  Just like we all do so many times in our own lives.  It’s a great lesson to learn.

This I Need To Remember

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / Leave a comment

Yesterday was the day Noah has been waiting for since school started in August.

Drum roll please…..HOMEWORK!!!  Yep.  He and the rest of his first grade class were all equally excited yesterday to get their first homework.

I know, cute isn’t it?

I watched him walk to the car, homework folder in hand with a huge smile on his face.  A smile that said “I have made it.  I am a big kid now.”  Homework serves as his first right of passage, as it should be.  Homework should be special and should focus on building the skills that are taught at school.  It should be relevant.

I want to give a big shout out to the kids school for giving homework that is relevant and makes them think.

As soon as he got into the car, he started talking about his homework and questioning where he was going to do it.

I suggested the dining room table.  You would have thought I suggested doing it on the roof of a moving car.

“NO. Mom it has to be somewhere quiet and it should be my own desk.”

Well, we have been dragging our feet on getting a new desk for our den where the kids can do homework.  So, Noah convinced us to bring up his desk from the basement.

So, we moved it upstairs and cleaned it off and he was so excited.  We got “real” pencils out–“yellow ones like I have at school.”

He did two word problems: Draw a picture or write a number equation to solve each problem.  1) An avocado has 1 seed.  I used 4 avocados to make guacamole.  How many seeds do I have?   2) This week I ate 2 plums and 3 peaches.  How many seeds did I end up with this week?

What is great about those two problems is that they have spent the last 5 weeks exploring seeds and learning about fruits and vegetables.

He worked on his homework for about 20 minutes and completed most of it–they get it on Monday and it is due on Friday.  I can already tell that science and math will be what he enjoys more than writing.  One of his homework pages is brainstorm a list of “15 things I can write about”–for writers workshop.  He struggled a bit with grasping the idea of topics for writing as opposed to specific events–but the writing teacher in me was in HEAVEN.  He has one page left–a sheet with pictures of fruit–cut so that you can see the insides and he is suppose to write what he notices.

I know that this LOVE of homework will be short lived and so I want to document this moment, so when he’s in 2nd or 3rd grade, I can remind him how excited he was to have homework.

The Son

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / Leave a comment

August 21, 2006

I still remember this day–as though it was yesterday.  It was heart-wrenching.  It was both happy and sad.  We go to meet our son for the first time–but by looking at his frail, lithe, sick little body, we weren’t sure he’d be coming home with it.  Shortly after this picture was taken, we rode with him and many other children to see a doctor–who sadly was gone for the rest of the day.  We then drove to another doctor.  After that visit, we were taken back to Wanna and then we had to take Noah back to the hospital.  I remember walking down the hall with him and being so scared that we were leaving him there.  A hospital in a developing nation is a hard place to leave your child.  I knew his nanny would be with him and would watch him all night, but it was so hard.  He stayed in the hospital the next day–we didn’t get to see him as we had to go to immigration and take care of other logistics.  The next day Bill and I got to see him and visit another doctor and then Bill and I refused to take him back to the hospital.  We just couldn’t.  We knew that if we took him with us and loved him and gave him everything we could, that he would be okay.  It was a risk we had to take.

August 21, 2012

Today we (as were in 2006) are so pleased we took that risk.  He has grown and blossomed into an incredible kid, person, friend, brother and son.  He started first grade–I can’t believe it.  I hate to be cliche–but time goes so fast.  His spirit is amazing and to watch his personality develop continues to be amazing.  Being a parent is the hardest thing I have ever done, but it is also the most rewarding.

This morning is the early morning hours, Noah and I sat on the couch.  I held him close in my lap and kissed his head and told him that 6 years ago, half-way around the world, I got to hold him just like this for the first time.  We talked about how he was sick and why we celebrate Noah day on August 23rd and not August 21.  We decided in Ethiopia we would celebrate the day that we became his parents–the day we stuck out necks out and took a risk for our son.  The day we were his advocate.  That is the day that made us a family.  That is the day we celebrate.  We talked about how he was lucky to be at Wanna being cared for, because if he hadn’t been–he probably would not have survived.  We talked about how not having access to clean water is really sad and that getting medicine isn’t easy.  He thinks its sad that they can’t just go to Target and get the medicine they need.  I assured him that I think it’s sad too.  Every child, every parent should have access to the simplest things in life and water is one of them. Medicine is another.

I hope these are lessons that my children carry with them and I hope it informs the adults they grow into and influences their actions.

Beware of the Goose

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / Leave a comment

There is something amazing about the age 4.  The things that come out of their mouths is often priceless and sadly, I have been so busy with work and the kids, I haven’t had the chance to document many of them.

We were driving home on Sunday from my dad’s house and Zoë says so innocently:

“I know what a haunted house is?”

“Really?” I ask–she currently has always known everything.

“Yep.”

“Well, what is a haunted house?”

“A house no one lives in and we have one by our house.”

“We do?”  I ask knowing full well what house she is talking about.  We have a vacant house on our little block–while they get it ready to sell.

“The one by Madeline and Nora’s.”

“Zoë, a haunted house is not an empty house.  A haunted house is a house where ghosts live.”

“Oh.  I think that one is a haunted.”

“Really, why?”

“I think I saw a goose in there…or maybe a duck.”

So, beware of the goose’s ghost 🙂

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Last night we were driving home for a long night of activities for Noah and Zoë provided more entertainment.

“Mom, remember at Christmas eve when we were driving home and we were looking in the sky for Rudo.”

“Rudo?”

“The reindeer with the red nose.”

Noah started laughing and I tried not to–because she is 4 and only his close friends get to call him Rudo.

“That is Rudolf honey.”

“Oh.”

Then she started to sing–after Noah and I argued for 3 minutes on the correct pronunciation of “rudolf”

I say Rudolf and Noah said Rudoff.

 

How Meet The Robinsons Got My Kids Asking Questions

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / Leave a comment

Well, last night we sat down after Judo to each dinner and the kids wanted to watch SpongeBob.  I did not (yes sometimes we eat dinner around the TV–not always but sometimes–done judging?).  So I was looking for something entertaining and I noticed that Meet the Robinsons was on.  So I flipped to that and Noah was immediately interested and asked “Where is the guy we are looking for–the main character?”

We watched the movie until the neighbors got home and then the kids went and jumped on the trampoline together (I know what you are thinking–“don’t you know how dangerous trampolines are?”  Well I do, and I also know they are fun).  Then we finished watching the movie.  At the end, we had a long discussion about the premise of the movie and the idea of time travel and how cool that would be–and it took Noah a bit to understand the whole idea of being able to go into the future, etc.  But in the end put it together.

Then we talked about the adoption part.  Then he asked about his own adoption story–he wanted to know what I knew.  This is the first time he has really asked for me to tell him what I know–he was never interested before.  So we talked a long time (I will not tell the story here–as it belongs to my son).  We talked about how he was in the hospital and Bill and I were so scared that he wasn’t going to live and then we talked about how babies sometimes die all over the world from things that seem not to bad to those of us fortunate enough to have money and regular access to doctors and healthy food and environments.  Then Zoë wanted to know her story and hers is more cloudy than Noah’s story and a bit more sad).  It was a hard conversation, as you want to be honest but these kids are only 4 1/2 and 6 and adoption, while happy for us, is also very sad and confusing for kids–especially for kids who are adopted internationally.

After our talk, they were both visibly sad.  They didn’t know how to feel.   They were sad that there was their birthmoms who they wouldn’t ever know.  Noah really wanted to know if his was alive and I had to say that I didn’t know.  He said “I think maybe she died.”  I had to say I didn’t know, but I can see how for a child it might be an easier way to understand and/or cope.  We then talked about Ethiopia and the nannies who took such good care of them when they were babies waiting for us.  They talked about being excited to travel to Ethiopia and play with the babies and kids who are waiting for families.  They want to thank the nannies who took care of them.

It was such a great conversation, but it was so hard.  I am glad we had it, but I know it isn’t the last time we will talk about it.  These are conversations I always knew we would have and have had some version of over the last almost 6 years, but when we got that phone call 6 years ago today about a 1+ month old baby boy, I had no idea how complex this parenting thing would be.

I wouldn’t change a minute of it or a single choice we made.