Randomness

Be Proud–But Only In Target Markets

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / Leave a comment

Last week Amalah wrote this post on Moxiebird about Old Navy’s Pride Tee that they are launching for June (Pride month) and for the “It gets better” project.  I was so excited.  I couldn’t wait to run out (aka–online to old navy) and get one for each of the kids and one for myself.  But then I found out that they were only selling the shirts in stores.  Okay, so I’ll just run out to one of the 6 or so Old Navy’s in my city.

WAIT.  They are only available at 26 stores.  26 stores in only 21 cities.  Are these the only cities where folks are allowed to be proud?  My city has a large Pridefest celebration.  But we can’t buy an Old Navy Pride Tee?  That sucks.  What would I tell my kids if they were older–sorry kids we have to move in order to celebrate your uncle or any one who loves differently.

I am sure they did some sort of location testing to see what markets would want the shirts and which ones wouldn’t.  But seriously, they couldn’t make them available online.  I am so disappointed in Old Navy and their choice to only sell in certain markets.  I know a lot of people who would have bought these shirts in my city.

Come on Old Navy–let us all be PROUD.

The Dangers of Blogging

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 5 Comments

Well it has finally happened.  This little space here of mine on the internet has caused a bit of a family scandal.  This post has caused a bit of a ruckus.   I have lived in this space for over 5 years, writing about all aspects of my life–the good, the bad, the embarrassing, and the ugly.  There are plenty of things I don’t blog about.  On principle and out of respect for my husband–I don’t blog about him personally or about the intimate details of our relationship.  I don’t write specifics about my family that aren’t commonly know facts or something I would feel comfortable saying to their face.

My family is not into this whole internet thing and my brothers have always thought and expressed how stupid they think blogging is.  I haven’t readily shared the link to my blog with family–not because I want to hide what I am writing, but because this space is mine and I’m going to write what I need to and some people don’t understand that.  This is my personal space–notice I did not say private–where I express my opinions, feelings, hopes and dreams for my kiddos, my perspective on problems, so on and so on.  This means that some people might be offended at my truth.

This post couldn’t be more innocuous.  It states simple facts–that are simple and straight forward–they are not judgements.  I don’t judge my parents because of the circumstances of my life.  They did the best they could–they were young parents and I can’t imagine raising kids at a young age and they stayed together for us as kids and they worked hard to make sure we had what we needed.  I got soccer trips and vacations, etc.  This post wasn’t about what my parents did or didn’t do; it was a post about what I did.  I will not feel bad celebrating my accomplishments.  Did my parents help me with photography school?  Yes.  Did I finish–no because I couldn’t afford it.  There are many things that my parents did–good and bad–that have made me the person I am today.  But I went back to school at 25–on my own.  I fought to raise the grades I had after getting kicked out of community college when I was 19.  I worked my ass off–going to school full-time and working full-time.  I pulled all-nighters writing papers and reading.  I bought my first computer.  These are things I did on my own and to say that doesn’t diminish the fact that my parents raised me.  It doesn’t change any of that.

There are a variety of reports–but only ~30% of PhD recipients are first-generation college students.  So out of every 100 PhD’s awarded approximately 30 or less are first-generation college students.  To get kicked out of community college (at 19) and to then persist on to a PhD is a very unlikely story.  The odds were stacked against me and I know that better than anyone.  But I fought for something I thought was immensely important.  I fought.  I borrowed and leveraged.  Maybe some would say it was foolish to borrow so much for an education.  Maybe some will say I would have been better off settling.  But I have ambitions and will follow them.  I did it to prove to myself that I could and because it is something I want.  I didn’t ask for help.  I did it on my own and I am not sorry for that.  Is that to say my parents weren’t factors?  Or my husband?  No–but they weren’t the ones doing the work.  It was me and no one can take that away from me.

This very well has cost me my relationship with one of my brothers.  That is something I will live with.  I don’t want or need someone in my life (family or not) who doesn’t respect me and judges me based on one blog post out of 905.  I will not be responsible for how others feel.  I am responsible for myself.  I considered just pulling the plug on this whole blog thing.  But no.  This is my space.  This is my life and I have nothing to hide and nothing to be ashamed of.  I’m sorry if there are some who think I do.

A Conversation I Never Thought I’d Have

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 2 Comments

Playground conversations are often mundane.  When I pick Noah up from school, he usually wants to play a little on the school playground with his friends.  That means I have to talk with the other moms.  Not that it’s painful.  I don’t mind talking.  I’ve said it here before and will say it again–I am not a chit chatter.  I like to talk and I’m social and I have no problem talking about things, but I am not good at small talk.  One, because my life is so full of things, I don’t have time to even think about what small talky things.

On Wednesday, I picked the kids up from school and Noah was playing and I was talking to one of the moms.  And she is a mom I like.  She’s really nice and is my age.  When you have kids that are young when you are not so young, the norm is that the other parents are 10 or so years younger.  I have to say we are pretty fortunate as most of the parents at Noah’s school are within our age group.  So, we were chatting about exercising, like I have anytime for that, but she doesn’t work and her kid’s in school full-time so she has time to yoga and other things.  Then we were talking about junk food, etc.  I can certainly relate to that, I think just talking about it I gained 5lbs.  She then says,  “I…This might fall under the category of TMI…”

Let me just stop you there.  If you have to preface what you are saying with it might fall under the category of TMI, then chances are good that it does.  But I encouraged her, as I know she is new to STL and doesn’t necessarily have a lot of friends locally.  Who am I to judge.  I shared about my first brazillian bikini wax with my close friends.  So, I am practicing being a girl.  Anyway.  I said, “don’t worry about it.”

“I had my first two colonics.” She said.

I have no idea what the look on my face portrayed.  I tried to look interested.  I did.  I just wasn’t expecting it.  I really wasn’t.  There just is no way to prepare yourself for that.

“I was reading in a yoga magazine blah blah blah people are supposed to poop two or three times a day blah blah blah really you’re suppose to poop every time you eat blah blah”

I’m think if I pooped everytime I ate, I’d have to work in the bathroom.

“And your intestines are like 6 feet long and waste can stay in there for years.  My technician said that one time a barbie shoe came out of a guy that he had swallowed as a kid.”

All I can think is gross and that maybe the whole gun does/can stay in your system for 7 years.

“You can have anywhere from 4-14 pounds of waste in your colon.”

Might not be a bad weight loss strategy–other than it involves someone basically putting a hose up my butt to flush it out.

“I felt like I could run a marathon afterwards.  It was great.  You should look into it.  Here is the card.”

I was polite and said “wow that sounds good. I’ll have to look into it.”

I am so not looking into it.

Who Doesn’t Want 10 Dollar Cotton Candy?

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 3 Comments

Me.  That’s who.  On Saturday, we went to Disney on Ice.  My aunt–who is totally awesome–works at a local radio station and is able to get awesome tickets to most of the kids events that come through town that my kids would love to go to but that I am not buying tickets for because my kids already have done more stuff in their short number of years than I did through my teen years.  My aunt love my kids and loves to take them to these things (she is dying for grand kids I think, but it’s going to be a while and my kids are pretty awesome).  Anyway.  I have learned my lesson and I know prep my kids before we go by telling them they can each have one snack to eat and NO TOYS–because I have that middle class syndrome of getting my kids too much crap and then wondering where the hell all my money went.

Zoë asked if she could have cotton candy as her snack and I said sure.  We get there and of course the only people selling cotton candy are the Disney sellers and the stadium stands are only allowed to sell certain items.  So, I ask for cotton candy and the guys gives me a relatively small bag of air and sugar and asks for 10 dollars.  TEN DOLLARS.  Are you freakin’ kidding me?  It’s sugar and air.  It did have a rubber Flounder (from The Little Mermaid) top to it, but seriously–I only wanted cotton candy.

Then Noah of course wants his snack.  He wants a sno cone.  I choke a little when I look at the price of the sno cone in the Mickey Mouse souvenir cup-15 dollars.  FIFTEEN DOLLARS.  It’s ice and sugar water.  Really.  I know I am paying for the cup, but I told my kids we weren’t buying anything except snacks.  But the Disney and other people have caught on and now they sell snacks with souvenir’s integrated so they can charge you an arm and a leg.

I am certainly not a cheap person.  I don’t mind spending money, but really?  I can’t even take my kid to a show without being forced to spend money on something if I want to buy them something completely unhealthy and fun to eat?  That is what irritates me.  Is that the choice has been taken away and it sucks.  I won’t even start on the 7 dollars I paid for a fountain soda.  I know they are in business to make a profit and I can respect that, but really??? I now know why so many people don’t take their kids to these things.  I know for sure that next time, I’ll be packing my own snacks and forgoing the 10 dollar cotton candy and 5 dollar pretzels.