Separation

This weekend was a big shake up at our pad.  The kids decided on Sunday that they wanted their own rooms.  Well, not really kids–more like kid.  Zoë decided she was ready to move into her room.  Her room had been the playroom while her and Noah shared a bedroom.  So, we spent Sunday morning taking apart beds, separating toys and moving furniture around.  It was fun and I love Zoë’s room (I’ll post a pics later this week).  Zoë loves her room and it makes getting the kids to clean up and take ownership of their room a little easier.  This morning–neither complained about making their bed.

I was worried that they weren’t ready to have their own room–okay maybe I wasn’t ready for this next stage of growing up.  I know it sounds funny that they are growing up–they are only 5 and almost 4.  But they are growing and changing and developing their independence.  I know this means that someday they’ll need/want/crave/have their independence from me as well.  And while I accept that as a natural progress, it scare me because I love them so much and the unknown is hard.

Noah loves having his own room–he has slept in his bed all night the past two nights and goes to sleep on his own without us sitting with him.  He’s getting so big.

Zoë has done pretty good going to sleep–we still sit with her as she SLOWLY drifts off to sleep and she has stayed in her bed until about 3am.  I know she’ll adjust and be back to staying in her bed all night.

They are truly happy to have their own room and their own space.   A place that is theirs.  A place that they can be themselves and explore their things.  It’s pretty nice to see that develop.  I know it means they are growing up.  But it also shows me that we are doing our job of raising them to be independent.  Ah–what a double-edged sword that is.

Learning Confidence

Noah started taking Judo and Tae Kwon Do two weeks ago–okay maybe three weeks ago.  I have to say he absolutely loves it and I love how much he loves it.  It is so great to see him blossoming and voicing his own likes and dislikes.  I have tried really hard not to pressure him into doing things and have let him decide what he wants to do–even if I know he won’t like it (flag football for one).  But I think it is important that the kids get to decide and have a say in their own activities.  But they also know that if they commit to something they have to see it through for a period of time.

I knew Noah would love martial arts and he’s been asking to do it since he was three.  I made him wait until he was 5.  I made him wait because I wanted him to be old enough to pay attention and get the most out of it as he could.  I made that mistake with Zoë and ballet right when she turned 3.  So, I’m learning from my mistakes.  But I wish I would have let Noah start sooner, only because of how much he loves it.  He has had 10 classes now and he goes 3x per week–which is a lot, but he wants to do it.  And it’s close to home and it gets him active and it is teaching him discipline and confidence.

He is a pretty outgoing kid–but he also pretty reserved in new situations as he observes people, etc.  He is also a sponge–I can just see his mind working as he is trying to figure it all out.  He is contemplative and tactical.  He is learning to “think” less and just do.  That is great to see.  It’s important to have both skills.

He is learning to count in Japanese and Korean as he has to be able to do both for his yellow belt test–which is still about 7 or so weeks away at the earliest.  He isn’t in any real rush–okay I take that back–I’m not in any rush for him to test for his yellow belt.  I don’t want to put the pressure on him, but he is already learning that you just do the bet you can–you do what you can and as long as you are trying your hardest it’s okay.  I am hoping that he will be able to apply that insight in marital arts to his other things–like piano, etc.  But he is growing and not just older but as a person.  It’s a beautiful thing to witness and be part of as a parent.

Here is a from his first TKD practice match at class (this was his 8th class)

The Power Of Social Media

Sometimes all you have to do is ask.  Last year around this time Pottery Barn Kids released their holiday catalog and there was something many of us with kids of color noticed about the stockings.  All of the faces were white.  I know I wanted to buy my daughter a stocking but there were no girls that looked even remotely like her.  In a world where most of the images of beauty reflected back are those of white skin and often blond hair, I don’t want my daughter to think that she is not normal or acceptable.  I want her to have a positive image of her skin.  I also want this for Noah, even though he seems less aware or at least pays less attention to it than Zoë does.

Last year, many of us descended upon the Pottery Barn Kids Facebook page and demanded dark skin stocking for our children of color.  Yes, many of us are white, middle-class, parents of adopted children.  But I don’t think that matters.  What mattered was that we wanted our children to see themselves reflected back in a product.  I notice so often what kinds of images and messages are sent to kids and also notice that there are few non-white images for my children to identify with and draw from.

I have to say I was really happy today to look at the stockings and see these:

I will admit these aren’t perfect. The hair is a little straight for my liking–I’d like to see some curls in the elf’s hair and the angel’s hair.  But this is a huge step forward.  The color is not exactly right and is still a little light, but it is dark and it is progress.  I’ can’t wait to buy mine for the kids.  They will love them.

Clean Eating Week 3

So, I totally failed again this week with the whole taking pictures of glorious food.  Well, maybe part of the problem is I didn’t make a bunch of glorious food.  I lived on chicken and various veggies all week as I was super busy.  The one thing I did make this week that is mostly clean is Apple Pie.  The kids went apple picking with their grandparents (Lori, are there pictures?) and brought home a bounty of apples.

I say the apple pie was partially clean because I cannot (will not) make crust without butter.  It just can’t be done.  You need that to get that flaky pie crust that makes pie worth eating.  So, the crust isn’t completely clean–but the filling is and I have to say that it was really really good–I know sorry no pictures.

Otherwise–this wasn’t a great week for clean eating.  I’d say I was about 75% clean, which isn’t bad but is certainly not where I want to be.  But that apple pie?  Scrumptious.

 

For-Profit And Education Do Not Mix

I have worked in urban education for 11 years now and in many different capacities and have been able to many sides of education.  Currently and for the past two years, I have worked with charter schools.  I am a proponent of public education.  I have always worked in public education and plan to always work in public education.  I was also skeptical of charter schools before I started this job and to tell you the truth I am still a little skeptical.  Starting a school is hard and there is so much expertise, knowledge and skill that is required.  One cannot just have a big heart.   I am 100% against for profit charter school or any kind of school operators who are in education for-profit (higher ed is quickly expanding in this way).  Schools should not be in the business of making a profit.  This just seems obvious to me.  When companies are in something to make a profit, shortcuts happen and it is the students who suffer and pay the true price.

Education is not a money making business–or it shouldn’t be a money making business.  But it has become a huge industry with standardized testing, textbooks, canned curricula, etc.  There have to be ways to get the bottom line to be just that a bottom line.  We need to put students and teachers first and put worry about lining the pockets of industry out of our minds.  Why do schools even buy textbooks?  Don’t we trust our schools and teachers enough to design curriculum and teach?  I once had a professor who challenged us by saying that if all we were going to do was teach from a textbook, anyone could do our job.  You don’t need any real training if all you are doing is following the textbook. And with technology today–why do we need textbooks.  Everything a teacher needs can be found without having to buy a text series.  If your teachers cannot create their own material–then maybe they shouldn’t be teaching.

I will admit, that the only time I have used a textbook was during my student teaching (because I had to).  I used the textbooks occasionally when I taught for a particular short story or group of poems, but I did not use the canned textbook curriculum and I worked really hard to create authentic learning experiences for students.  Was I as authentic as I could have been?  No.  But I determined what to teach and how it should be taught.  I created my own quizzes and tests based on what I determined was valuable.  I did look at what students were expected to learn and where their weaknesses were based on my own formative and informal assessments.  That is what a teacher does.  They know their content; they know where their students are academically;  they know where their students need to go; THEY (not a textbook or curriculum company) design classroom instruction and pick the materials that will best get their students to their goals.

This is not what happens in most urban schools (traditional public or charter public).  Urban schools spend a lot of money on buying “designed for them” curriculum from big name/big money companies.  These companies are in essence determining what and how students are taught particular subjects.  They determine the testing that is used.  These out of the box, ready-to-use curricula come with benchmark tests that are to be administered every 6 weeks.  EVERY. SIX. WEEKS.  When the hell is their time for teaching?  When is their time for differentiation?  When is there time for authentic learning? This isn’t the way it needs to be–there are plenty of examples of schools who do better and I don’t buy the argument that it’s the kids or their resources.  This is part of why teachers get so much of the blame, when really the blame lies with the control of the landscape by companies who are profiting from selling their uninspired curriculum.

Why don’t schools create their own curriculum?  Often curriculum directors are in charge of buying the curriculum that school use, as opposed to working with teachers to design a curriculum that is thoughtful, useful and engages students in thinking and learning.  I don’t want to hear it isn’t possible or it isn’t possible with student who are so far behind, etc.  I am tired of hearing excuses for the status quo.  I know what is possible and I know what can happen.  Kids are kids and all kids can learn. All kids want to learn.  What is often mistaken for disinterest or apathy is an inability to do the work. Often it is a reaction to work that is meaningless or de-contextualized from anything in the students’ lives.

When we use curricula that has been designed for the masses, we do a disservice to our students and it sends the message that we don’t/can’t take the time to create learning experiences that would help them.  The curriculum becomes the center and the students become passive receivers of the chosen knowledge.  Shouldn’t we as teachers be content area specialists?  I’m an English teacher with a B.A. in English and a M.A. in English/Composition.  I know my subject. I also am a trained teacher and know how to teach my subject.  I think all teachers need to be content specialists.  Yes even elementary teachers.  There is no reason schools can’t have teachers who are literacy specialists and teacher who are math content specialists who either team teach or trade classrooms.  There are models that work and if we stopped spending so much money on curricula designed for the masses and money on standardized testing, we could have classrooms that work.  We could have teachers who are professionals and teachers who create with students a curriculum that teaches as well as engages students.

But as long as textbook publishers and testing companies are in the game–nothing will change.