Let Kids Be Kids

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 1 Comment

We went to story-time today at one of our local Borders stores.  I am not a big fan of story time, because quite frankly my toddler cannot sit that long and he has the attention span equal to the life span of a gnat–about 33 seconds.  So being in a confined space surrounded by shiny objects that do nothing but distract with a bunch of other highly distracted kids isn’t my idea of family fun.  But to Minnow’s credit, he did a really good job.  He flirted with another little girl in our mom’s group and looked at the book being read. 

After story-time, the kids made a little bear.  They colored, etc.  Minnow was coloring (well not really coloring–he was drawing with a small golf pencil).  He was standing next to a set of sisters and the girls mother was standing behind them commenting on their coloring.  Her one daughter–I’d say she was about 3–was starting to color outside of the lines.  The mother pointed to the color outside of the line and told her to watch what she was doing and then preceded to tell her to look at how good her sister was doing. 

I felt really sorry for the little girl.  The tone the mother used was not one of jest but of pure seriousness.  Really, kids can’t color outside of the lines?  Kids can’t work it out for themselves?  Kids can’t explore and take risks?  Kids can’t be creative?  Do we really start to indoctrinate our kids that there are rules and lines in life that should not be crossed?  I hope to let my son color outside of the lines–at this point I haven’t even really given him lines to draw in. 

Let the child explore and try and color outside of the lines to test the waters.  Let them stretch their wings and see what they hit. 

How do you encourage your child to stretch their wings and color outside of the lines? 

Weekend Over…

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 1 Comment

I love the weekend.  I love the weekend because Hubby is home and I get a little repreive from 24/7 parenting.  I get to do school work to my content (yes I am a total dork and love going to school–is it any wonder I’m working towards a doctorate).  I get to go to the gym when I want to not when I have to in order to fit it into a usually busy schedule.  The weekends are awesome–even though they really aren’t that different than my other days of the week. 

I am applying for a graduate research assistant position for next year.  I am nervous that I will get it and that they won’t even want to interview me.  I am nervous I will get it because for those of you who haven’t been following along, we are getting ready to bring home a new baby in June.  I am also nervous that I will get it and will be expected to do real-world academic work.  It will be awesome for me as I hope to get a job at a University on completion of my doctorate.  But then there is the whole–childcare issues, etc.  But it isn’t a full-time job (approx 20 hours) and there is a stipend for tuition and some pay involved.  So, we’ll see. 

I am nervous about not getting called for an interview, because I really really want a job in academia.  I would love not to be teaching as an adjunct at the community college.  I would love the research experience and the close work with an esteemed compositionist.  I have had her as a professor and I think that my status as a doctoral student will help me, but who knows.  I hate these moments when my insecurities kick in and make me feel unworthy of all that I have done.  As though, I am an impostor and at any moment I will be found out.  I know its crazy, but real nonetheless–even if only in my own mind. 

Well, I am going to enjoy the fleeting moments of my weekend, before it’s Monday and I have to get back to being all things to all people.  I love it when I only have to be me–even though those moments become fewer and farther between. 

How do you manage to balance only having to be you with all the other hats you wear? 

Reasons Why I Am Happy To Live Where I Do

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 3 Comments

 You can go to this section of the WHOwebsite and read about 5 different women in 5 different developing countries having babies–it gives snapshots of these 5 women at different stages of their pregnancy and upt to a year after their child is born.  It is sobering to think of the realities that faced the mothers of my children.  

9.7% of births in Ethiopia are attended by a skilled attendant.

1 in 14 women in Ethiopia die during pregnancy or childbirth.

only 27 % of pregnant women in Ethiopia receive/have access to prenatal care.

In Ethiopia, 37% of infants between 6 and 11 months are underweight.

In Ethiopia, 38 in every 1000 babies die in their first seven days of life from preventable diseases.

In Ethiopia, 110 in every 1000 babies die before their first birthday.

In Ethiopia, 1 in 6 children die before their fifth birthday. The majority of these deaths are due to preventable and treatable conditions such as pneumonia, malaria and measles.

In Ethiopia, only 17% of children under five years old sleep under bed nets to protect them against malaria.

So this drives me, pushes me, forces me, to want to make some sort of REAL contribution to the country that has given me so much.  I am going to start raising money to buy Mosquito nets for beds.  I am in contact with my agencies director to try and find an already established outlet to make sure that these nets get to families with children who live in areas that are susceptible to malaria. 

If you are interested in donating money to this effort–I implore you to do so–contact me at dawn @ sbcglobal dot net.  I will set up a streamlined way to collect donations.  My goal is to be able to provide as many nets for as many families as I can. 

How will you help?  What are willing to do to change the quality of life of another human being? 

Featured Link

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 1 Comment

I just got my copy of Rebecca Woolf’s book Rockabye:From Wild to Child.  I totally recommend it.  I started reading it right away and am having a hard time putting it down.  She is poignant, honest, and witty.  Reading her book is like sitting down with your best girlfriends, a pitcher of margaritas and telling the deepest darkest secrets.  It is a must read.  Check out her blog and buy her book. 

Ordinary Life Thursday–Letter A

/ Dawn Kasal-Finley / 1 Comment

New weekly posting–idea stolen shamelessly from here.

Adoption
I think it is very appropriate that I start my A list of ordinary life events/words/comments with a word that is very dear to me and a word that I live everyday.

Adoption is that amazing (and sad) process that has allowed Hubby and I to know what it is to be a parent.  I am happy that adoption exists for purely selfish reasons and am very sad that there is such a need for adoptive parents from the perspective of a human being.  All children deserve loving and safe homes with a parent(s) who love them.  Minnow and Peepers are loved by us deeply, but I think they would have been loved and are loved by those who have deemed it necessary to give them up to a “better” life. 

Next time to meet an adoptive family–please refrain from telling the parent or the child how lucky the child is that they get to live in America or with this particular family.  Tell the parent how lucky they are to be blessed with the opportunity to raise the amazing gift of a child.  It really is the parents who are the luckiest.  This is certainly how I feel everyday-even at 4 in the morning when Minnow decides he is done sleeping. 

Academia
I have spent a huge portion of my life as a member of Academia.  How is this possible when I despise Academia on so many levels.  I hold 2 degrees in English (BA and MA) and am currently working on a PhD in Education.  I despice Academia for its elitist ideas and its focus on self-preservation.

Academia only exists for itself–in its most theoretical branches (English–literature not comp).  But Academia serves a purpose…or do I only want to think that because I am so enmeshed in it?  For those of you who have advanced degree–I have not idea why they call them that–you understand the completely cerebral nature of the Academia that often has no real world application.  I have written papers ad nauseum about works of literature that will never serve me in polite converstaion…I mean when will I need to discuss the emasculation of Nat Turner? 

More A’s to come next week….Still waiting for more word suggestion (Jenni-I will certainly do your word next week)