I’m back from my wonderfully relaxing and extremely exhilirating vacation at Cedar Point, OH. We survived the thrill rides. If you like roller coasters–this is the place to go. WOW is all I can say. We left early Friday morning after dropping the puppies off at their hotel. The flight was short and eneventful and all I could think about was how the next time we would be leaving home we would be going to Ethiopia to meet and bring home our son. Anyway, we arrived in Cleaveland and their airport is really nice. I’m jealous as our airport sucks.

We thought about going to the rock n’ roll hall of fame. But decided not to spend $20 each to go and look at some memoribilia and history of rock–most of which my hubby already knows. We did drive by though, so it is like we went. Cleaveland seems like a pretty nice city. We drove to Cedar Point, along Lake Erie as much as we could. It really is beautiful there. I do like the great lakes region. It was really beautiful. We arrived in Sandusky–yeah not much there. Certainly wouldn’t want to live there. We checked in and went to the park. It was great to have evening passes to the park with our package. We didn’t wait more than 15 minutes in line for any ride. I can just imagine what the waits are like during their busy months. We rode some really thrilling rides. Hubby would say that they were scary as he is really terrified of heights. But he is a trooper since I really like this stuff. We then went to dinner. Well there really isn’t anything or anywhere to really eat. A few chain places but not much else. It is a tourist center. We found and out of the place Mexican restaurant and it was the “loudest” decour I have ever seen. But the food was absolutely awesome.

The next day we went to Soak City–the water park. Just so you know–waterproof 50spf applied 3 times does not protect as well as one might think when you are really pale and in the water all day. Needless to say hubby and I resembeled brick buildings when we woke up Sunday morning and in a little bit of pain, but not too much. Sunday we went to Cedar Point again to ride a few of the rides we didn’t ride on Friday. Again we waited not very long for rides. The longest wait was about 45 minutes and that was for the most awesome ride ever. It is a rollercoaster–you get shot at 125mph straight up with a 360 degree turn over the top and then back down 90 degrees with another 360 degree turn. It is over in about 10 seconds but is the most awesome experience ever. Hubby refused to ride this one with me and he would have hated every second of it, so I am glad that he didn’t do it. We after about 4 hours at the park we had had enough sun and heat.

There are islands off the coast of Ohio in Lake Erie. Who would have thunk it? If you knew, no need to tell me. We took a ferry to one of the islands and it was so great. I loved it. We had a really romantic day/evening. We rented a golf cart and took it around the island and looked out over the lake. We had a fancy dinner on the water and watched the sunset from the ferry on our way back. I love the water and hubby and I really want to live on water someday–but freshwater not the ocean. It was so nice. I didn’t stress the whole trip about money, getting ready for the little one to come home, anything.

Now back to reality. Hubby and I have made a pact to not go out for 1 year. No dinners out–unless someone else treats (parents gotta love them), not movies out–only 1 rental a week. We spend too much money going out, and well, we just don’t have it anymore. As we are officially only a one income family. I received my very last paycheck on July 21st and that money paid for our vacation. I did promise my hubby that I wouldn’t become a complete freak about money. I will try my hardest, but I do worry about it. I am not getting ready to really think about what we need for our trip and things. I am trying not to stress out about court on Friday, as someone pointed out to me everything really is going my way. I am trying to see it their way, but from the inside it is hard. I know it will all work out but I still worry that it won’t. We do plan on gonig to Ethiopia on the 19th even if we are unable to bring the little one home. We will visit for the week, hold him, love him, etc and then return later to pick him up. That takes a little stress off, but I am still anxious.

Well we got our news about court. You would think I would be happier. But I am not. Our case did not pass court on the 24th–there was a minor error. Our case will be resubmitted on Aug 4th–yeah that is the final court date before the court closure. Samson–our agency’s attorney is confident that our case will pass then, so we have been given the go ahead to confirm our travel plans for our August 23rd embassy date. Well shit. My stomach is all tied up in knots. What the hell happens if we don’t pass court on the 4th? I can’t handle that. I won’t be able to handle that. I am not going to get a minute of sleep until I hear on the 4th. Thank goodness we are going out of town this weekend. I am going to need to be distracted–in a number of ways. This so sucks. I just for once in my life would like something to go exactly as it should. So everyone put in a kind word for us with the adoption fates as we really need some good thoughts coming out way.

SHIT….

I am still angered by what has happened to one of my fellow bloggers. But I have faith that it will all work out for her and she will have an Ethiopian baby soon. Some people were meant to be parents and I believe that her and her husband are of that category. Hope….it is so important and I have hope as well as faith in fate. You will have that baby that is meant to be yours. I absolutely believe that. I will be thinking about you. I can’t wait to hear about your baby.

Okay. It is frickin’ hot here in the midwest mississippi river valley. It is humid and sticky and our anciet ac unit has a slow leak so our freon slowly disapates outside leaving the inside not as cool as it should be. We need a new AC but damn they are expensive and so I need to get the AC guy out to service it and give me more freon. So that hubby stops complaining that it is “too hot” in the house. Wah.

Today we have our travel appointment at the travel clinic. Which means shots. And I loath shots, needles, anything of that sort. It was fun when we were going through infertility treatments and hubby had to shot me up with all those drugs. I am excited though too as this really does mean that we are getting closer. We are 23 days away from our tentative travel date. Unbelievable . That is like no time at all. 23 days until I get to meet my son who I feel as though I already know. It is awesome. It is scary.

But before I think and plan too much for our trip to Ethiopia we have another vacation to get ready for. We are going to the famed Cedar Point amusement park. Romantic right? Not really but hubby and I have a way of turning any trip we take into a romantic getaway. Maybe it is because we absolutely love to be with each other so much. I really can’t think of anyone else I want to spend time with. Not that I don’t love my family and friends, sure I do for an evening or an afternoon, but I love being with my hubby. That is how I knew it would work. He is the first and only guy I ever really wanted to spend time with. He makes me laugh. He loves me so very much and makes me feel good. We have so much fun together. This will be a great trip. It will be our last trip as a couple. After this trip, every trip we take we will be a threesome or more. That is awesome in itself. But this will be nice. We can only focus on us. We don’t have to obsess about whether the baby is missing us, about us missing the baby, etc. I am looking forward to it. Hubby needs it as he just got a promotion at work and he has been majorly stressed about work and is slightly stressed about the upcoming addition of baby.

I still am enjoying my new job as a stay at home mom. I have been getting a lot done and still have so much more to do. But it is nice. I like not having the pressure to get things done. When I was working and had weeks off during the summer there was so much pressure to get things done before going back to work, but now if I don’t get something done today I can get it done tomorrow, and I end up getting more done. I love it. And I was worried that I wouldn’t like staying at home. It rocks….

Well I will see you all when I get home from vacation on Monday. I will be refreshed and hopefully will have some fun pics of hubby and I having some fun….

I didn’t realize the power of these little blogs that we all write, sharing a glimpse into our lives, desires, dreams, and escapades. Until yesterday I was living in a naive world that the words I write her are like a secret being shared with friends over a bottle of wine or a pitcher of margiritas. No longer. There are people out there in cyberspace who are sharing in this adoption journey with me who may chose to use what I write here against me. After I have kindly invited them to come and be part of my life. What a violation. I cannot believe that there are malicious people out there who might be inclined to be petty enough to take what I write here and tattle on me. Really folks, do not judge lest thee be judged.

How seriously can we take what we read on this little snippets of someone’s life experiences? You certainly cannot tell if someone is fit to raise a child from reading about an event, their philosophies, etc. More importantly it really isn’t anyone else’s place to read what I write here and judge me. So what does this mean in the blog world. Should I have to censor myself because someone might decide to use what I say against me? Do I shirk away from raw honesty because it could tarnish someone’s view of me. These are questions that I really don’t have the answer to at this point. As a teacher, English major, etc…I spit in the face of censorship, even self-inflicited. I mean, if I can’t vent about life and explore my life defining moments here without being fearful that someone will report me to the higher athorities and punish me in some way for something that is taken out of the context of my life? I am angry, and feel sad for the person to whom this happened. I wish there was something I could do, but know that there isn’t. I am sorry that there are people who do not understand what a blog is and that it is a personal choice some people make about what to post and how to post it. We cannot stop living our lives because of how someone might view the choices we make, nor should we make life changing decisions about someone’s life based on a paragraph or two they posted on their blog. There are real people attached to these words. Real people with love, compassion, and a strong desire to be the best parents they can be. Please don’t use these words against me. There is more to me than what you might read here.

Well, my last day of my tenure as a teacher was July 14th. I decided that I would take a week off before I transitioned to my new job. So, yesterday marked the first day of my new job as housewife. I actually really enjoyed it. I got a lot done. It is amazing to me what I can get done in a couple of hours without the outside pressure of an outside job. I have managed to organize half of my living room–okay so maybe this doesn’t sound like much but remember me I am the one who doesn’t like house work and really thinks that I am not good at it. Hubby is impressed and hey, he is a tough critic. I think I will enjoy this staying at home. It really will be managable when I get a routine down. I even made hubby his lunch this morning. I am a morning person, sleeping until 730 is sleeping in for me. I still am enjoying a few hours of relaxing in the morning of blog reading and emailing watching and coffee drinking, but come on I must pace myself.

I hope to get the bathroom and kitchen cleaned today. I have found that setting a goal is great because then when you get it done you have a sense of accomplishment and anything above those tasks is a bonus and I can feel good about it.

We are 26 days away from leaving–if everything went okay in court yesterday. We should hear today and then we can finalize our travel plans which is awesome. Hopefully I will be posting later about a successful court hearing.