Stealing Their Hope, Damning Their Future

Last night, I was riveted by Dan Rather’s lastest HDNet show episode “A National Disgrace.”  It’s an expose on the Detroit public schools.  I only caught the last hour on TV last night but will watch the rest of it today on iTunes.  As an educator, this show made me cry.  The one student that they chronicle (that you will see in the clip) is representative of generation after generation of students whose future has been stolen.  Whose hope has been thrown away.  Whose dreams have been smothered.  I know this sounds harsh, but it is time that we are honest about the schools who serve our urban poor.  This is a population with no voice and no power.  This is a population that continues to grow and who we continue to ignore.

Deana (in the above clip) was lucky.  The camera men and production staff were heartbroken for her–she wanted to learn; she wanted to succeed.  They secured tutors for her and helped her with her college applications and explained her financial options (Rather remarks that it is nothing more than a guidance counselor would do) and she got into a four-year college–the first in her family.  This is quite a feat for someone who went to a district where teachers routinely don’t show up and kids can sit in classes without teachers for weeks and weeks and where only ~25% of students graduate high school.

As I was watching this,  I realized this report isn’t just about Detroit Public Schools.  This report is about every urban district and every school that we allow to steal our children’s future.  These are our children.  As a society, we cannot allow this to continue.  We can’t operate from the mindset that “my kids aren’t in those schools, so it doesn’t effect me.”   Because it does effect us.  It affects our countries ability to compete globally.  As our minority populations grow and our white population decreases, our educated class dwindles.  We can’t ignore the education that our poor and minority students aren’t getting.  No longer can we sit by and see these populations as something that can be thrown away.  No longer can we say–“pass them and let the world fail them.”  It is criminal what happens in our urban schools.  I know this first hand.  I taught in urban schools and I supervise student teachers in my own urban district.  I can tell you that what Rather exposes here is reality.  We can’t turn a blind eye.  We are letting generation after generation be damned to a life they don’t deserve.

I have seen teachers who show movies every day of the school year so they can sleep. I have seen teachers do nothing but assign worksheets so they could not teach.  I have seen teachers give up on students because it was too much trouble to care.  We can’t sit by and let this happen.  My kids are in private school and I have said before how lucky we are that it’s a choice and that we sacrifice a great deal to spend that money.  There are more families than not who don’t have that choice.  I shouldn’t have to make that choice for my kids.  If I didn’t live in the city, then I would have different choices.  But I choose to work in urban schools to make a difference.  Every child deserves a quality education.  Every child deserves to reach their potential and to know what their potential is.  Every child deserves adults who nurture them and want to teach them.  It makes me cringe.  It makes me sad.

So often it is our urban schools who get all the attention, but our rural schools face the same problems.  While I argue that a huge piece of this unequal education system we have is tied to race, the other huge piece of it is tied to socioeconomic status.  The poor also have no voice and by poor, I mean people who live in under-developed countrysides who might have great personal resources but as a community they have no status or leverage.

Education in our country is political and about power and it shouldn’t be (just like Healthcare shouldn’t be–that’s another post).  These are kids lives that are being played with and that isn’t fair.  Education needs to put children first and so many of our policies and choices have nothing to do with children and everything to do with the adults.  We can’t wait.  Everyday that goes by that we don’t face head on and fix this problem in the best interest of kids, another generation is doomed to fail and another piece of our economy disappears forever.  The time to act is now.

http://a.blip.tv/api.swf#gahRgreZWgI

Santa Claus, Jesus and Mothers

I know it sounds like the start of a bad joke.  But in honor of the 5 year anniversary of receiving Noah’s referral–I thought a Noah story was called for.

We had a whirlwind Mother’s day weekend.  It has to be a weekend when you have divorced parents.  I talked briefly with Noah and  Zoë about their Ethiopian mothers and we talked about the rose bushes that we planted two years ago as a way to honor them with new life every spring.  But we hadn’t really talked about them on Mother’s day itself.

So finally, last night after dinner I was sitting with Noah, my mom (whose birthday also happened to fall on Mother’s day this year) and brother and I asked Noah

“Who else do we have to remember to think about, celebrate and remember on Mother’s day”

“Santa Clause” he says after a moment of thinking.

“No” I said through a bit of a chuckle

“ummm…JESUS” he yells triumphantly

“No” At this point, I can barely not laugh–I’m exhausted and we don’t even go to church and I don’t know exactly how he made the connection there.

I prod him a little, “A special lady in…”

“My Ethiopian mom” he says with a small smile.

We talked a little about her but I wait for him to ask questions–I don’t want to overwhelm him with concepts he isn’t ready for.  Can’t believe the time has gone so fast.  I love you Noah and am so lucky to get to be your mom.

Thank you M.A. and Zoë’s birthmom, for your sacrifice, courage and selflesness.  Without you, I wouldn’t be blessed with these amazing children.  I see you in them and know how amazing both of you are.  I hope we do you proud.

Sorry Kiddo, No Flowers For You

Zoë is doing gymnastics and has been for about 12 weeks or so.  In the spring, her gymnastics club puts on a mini-olympics for the age groups who don’t compete at the USGA levels as a way to showcase their skills.  I think it’s a cute idea.  I remember my first club competition when I was about 8 or so–I actually had to remember and do a floor routine and a beam routine.  I remember being very nervous.  So, Zoë who is 3 had her “big performance” (that is how she dubbed it) yesterday.  She was with other kids ages 3-5.  It was really cute–they set up four circuits for the kids and they moved through them.  It was a bit like herding cats, but cute and Zoë kept looking into the stands and waving to us, etc.

I had noticed a few folks come in with bouquets of flowers.  My first thought was that they were for the older girl who would put on a show for everyone half way through the kids skill session.  I was taken aback when I started seeing other families with bouquets of flowers.  I thought, No these can’t be for these little kids.

I was so wrong.  There were at least 6 families that brought flowers in for their 3, 4, or possibly 5 year old gymnasts.  I was so surprised.  I couldn’t believe it.  I thought to myself, people really do this?  I could see if maybe they are really been part of a competition–but this was not a competition.  I still have a hard time believing it.

Zoë had fun and didn’t even notice the flowers.  She was much more enamored with her medal which she wore all day long.

Connections

There are many who feel the internet has taken over their lives and the lives of others.  There are those who don’t see the value in relationships made online.  I have to disagree completely with them.  The internet has allowed me to create an adoption community that allows my children to have connections to their birth country and more importantly to kids and families that look like theirs.  They have a shared story and it isn’t one that is written based solely on their skin color.  It is a complex story that can and will only be understood by those who have a similar experience.

This past weekend, we were lucky to meet up again with Noah and Zoë’s Ethiopian “cousins.”  These are kids who they share their early history with–kids who they were in our agency’s care center with.  There are many more “cousins” that we have not met or do not keep in as close touch with, but I have always believed it was important to keep some connections to my children’s past and birth country.  I am so thankful for Anne, Steph and Ginger.  I am so thankful for my own local Ethiopian adoption community.  The fabric of which  with only enrich my children’s lives and my own.

Thank you Internet for making the world smaller.